Adam Boulton | Westminster School | Newscaster |
Adam Buxton | Westminster School | Screenwriter, Comedian |
Adam Henson | Cheltenham College | TV Presenter |
Adam Holloway | Cranleigh School | Tory MP |
Adam Memon | The Grammar School at Leeds | 55 Tufton Street Scum |
Adam Rutherford | Ipswich School | Geneticist |
Ade Edmondson | Pocklington School | Comedian |
Adetomiwa Edun | Eton | Actor |
Adrian Newey | Repton | F1 Car Designer |
Aidan Gillen | St. Vincent's C.B.S. | Actor |
Aimee Lou Wood | Cheadle Hulme | Actor |
Alan Carr | Quinton House School | Comedian |
Alan Davies | Bancroft's School | Comedian |
Alan Rusbridger | Cranleigh | Guardian Editor |
Alan Whicker (RIP) | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Travel Presenter |
Alastair Campbell | Bradford Grammar | Editor |
Alastair Stewart | Salesian College | GBeebies Newsfart |
Alex Horne | Lancing College | Comedian |
Alex Lawther | Churcher's College | Actor |
Alex Younger | Marlborough College | Former MI6 Chief |
Alexander Armstrong | Durham | TV Presenter |
Alexander Fiske-Harrison | Eton | Writer |
Alexander Larman | Winchester College | Literary Editor of Spectator World, defender of paedophile Eric Gill |
Alexander Nix | Eton | Former CEO of Cambridge Analytica |
Alexandra Shulman | St Paul's Girls' School | Editor, Vogue |
Alfie Allen | Windlesham House School | Actor |
Alfred Enoch | Westminster School | Actor |
Ali Miraj | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' School | LBC Presenter |
Alice Eve | Bedales | Actor |
Alice Roberts | The Red Maids' School | TV Presenter |
Alice Thomson | School of St Helen and St Katharine | Journalist |
Alistair Brownlee | Bradford Grammar School | Oympian (Triathalon) |
Alistair Potts | Winchester College | Former World Champion Cox |
Alister Jack | Crawfordton House | Secretary of State for Scotland |
Allegra Stratton | Latymer Upper School | Former Downing Street Press Secretary |
Alok Sharma | Reading Blue Coat School | Tory MP, COP26 President |
Amanda Milling | Moreton Hall | Minister of State for Asia |
Amanda Spielman | St Paul's Girls' School | Chief Inspector of Ofsted |
Amber Rudd | Cheltenham Ladies' College | Former Secretary of State |
Amelia Gentleman | St Paul's Girls' School | Journalist, Boris Johnson's Sister-in-Law |
Anas Sarwar | Hutchesons' Grammar School | Leader of the Scottish Labour Party |
Andrea Riseborough | Newcastle upon Tyne Church High School | Actor |
Andrew Castle | Millfield School | LBC Presenter |
Andrew Garfield | City of London Freeman's School | Actor |
Andrew Marr | High School of Dundee | TV Presenter |
Andrew Murray | Worth School | Corbyn Crony |
Andrew Neil | Paisley Grammar School (was fee paying) | Chairman The Spectator |
Andrew Parker Bowles | Ampleforth College | King Charles' Custard Cousin |
Andrew RT Davies | Wycliffe College | Leader of the Welsh Conservative Group in the Senedd |
Andrew Selous | Eton | Tory MP |
Andy Serkis | St Benedict's School, Ealing | Actor |
Andy Street | King Edward's School, Birmingham | Mayor, West Midlands |
Andy Wigmore | Sacred Heart College | Brexit Wanker |
Andy Wilmore | Repton | TV Producer |
Anita Rani | Bradford Grammar | TV Presenter |
Anne-Marie Trevelyan | St Paul's Girls' School | Tory MP, Minister of State for Indo-Pacific |
Annie Nightingale | St Catherine's School, Twickenham | Radio Presenter |
Anthony Seldon | Tonbridge School | Educator and Contemporary Historian |
Anthony Smith | Winchester College | Sculptor |
Antoinette Sandbach | Haileybury and Imperial Service College | Former Tory MP, Descendant of Slavers |
Antony Worrall Thompson | King's School, Canterbury | Shoplifter |
Anya Taylor-Joy | Queen's Gate School | Actor |
Armando Iannucci | St. Aloysius' College | Screenwriter, Comedian |
Arron Banks | Crookham Court | Brexit Wanker |
Arthur Darvill | Bromsgrove School | Actor |
Banksy (Robin Gunningham) | Bristol Cathedral School (Fee paying from 1975 to 2008) | Graffiti Artist |
Barry Gardiner | High School of Glasgow, Haileybury College | Labour MP, Corbyn Crony, Brexshitter |
Bear Grylls | Eton | TV Presenter |
Ben Ainslie | Truro School | Olympian (Sailing) |
Ben Anderson | Bedford Modern School | Jornalist, Travel Presenter |
Ben Edwards | Reigate Grammar School | Commentator |
Ben Fogle | Bryanston | TV Presenter |
Ben Goldacre | Magdalen College School | Doctor, Author |
Ben Lovett | King's College | Keyboardist, Mumford & Sons |
Ben Shephard | Chigwell School | TV Presenter |
Ben Wallace | Millfield School | Secretary of State for Defence |
Benedict Cumberbatch | Harrow | Actor |
Bernard Jenkin | Highgate | Tory MP |
Bill Bailey | King Edward's School, Bath | Comedian, Musician |
Bill Cash | Stonyhurst College | Tory MP |
Bill Turnbull (RIP) | Eton | TV Presenter |
Billie Piper | Sylvia Young Theatre School | Singer, Actress |
Bim Afolami | Eton | Tory MP |
Bob Seely | Harrow | Tory MP |
Bob Stewart | Chigwell School | Tory MP |
Bonnie Langford | St Catherine's School, Twickenham | TV Presenter, Actor |
Boris Johnson | Eton | Disgraced former Tory MP & PM, Brexshitter-by-convenience, liar, cheat, philanderer, criminal, Russian asset and all-round scumbag |
Brandon Lewis | Forest School | Tory MP |
Brian Cox | Oldham Hulme Grammar School | TV Presenter |
Brian Leveson | Liverpool College | Judge |
Bronwen Maddox | Westminster School | CEO of "Chatham House" Think Tank |
Bruce Dickinson | Oundle School | Iron Maiden Frontman |
Caggie Dunlop | Wellington College | Reality TV Star |
Camilla Long | Oxford High | Tory Presstitute |
Camilla Parker-Bowles | Queen's Gate School | Queen Consort |
Camilla Tominey | St Albans High School For Girls | LBC Presenter |
Cara Delevingne | Bedales | Model, Actress |
Carey Mulligan | Woldingham School | Actor |
Carl Hester | Elizabeth College | Olympian (Equestrian) |
Carol Smillie | Hutchesons' Grammar School | TV Presenter |
Caroline Ansell | Beresford House School | Tory MP |
Caroline Lucas | Malvern Girls' College | Green MP |
Caroline Quinton | Tring Park School for the Performing Arts | Actor |
Carrie Johnson | Godolphin and Latymer School | Concubine |
Catherine, Princess of Wales | Marlborough College | Future Queen Consort |
Celia Walden | Westminster School | Right wing tabloid hate goblin and wife of Penis Morgan |
Charles Dunstone | Uppingham School | Entrepreneur, Co-founder of Carphone Warehouse |
Charles Edwards | Winchester College | Actor |
Charles Moore | Eton | Lord Temporal (former Telegraph Editor) |
Charles Spencer | Eton | Diana's Brother |
Charlie Falconer | Glenalmond | Architect |
Charlotte Ivers | Dean Close School | Times Journalist |
Charlotte Mendelson | Oxford High School | Author |
Charlotte Owen | Alderley Edge School for Girls | Unknown |
Charlotte Ritchie | James Allen's Girls' School | Actor |
Charlotte Smith | Loughborough High School | TV Presenter |
Chris Addison | Manchester Grammar School | Comedian |
Chris Harris | Clifton College | TV Presenter |
Chris Hollins | Tonbridge School | TV Presenter |
Chris Hoy | George Watson's College | Olympian (Cycling) |
Chris Martin | Sherborne School | Singer Songwriter |
Chris Morris | Stonyhurst College | Comedian, Screenwriter |
Chris Patten | St Benedict's School | Former Tory MP |
Chris Whitty | Malvern College | Chief Medical Officer for England |
Christian Candy | Epsom College | Property Developer |
Christian Fraser | Queen Elizabeth's Grammar School | Senior News Correspondent, BBC News |
Christian Horner | Arnold Lodge School | F1 Team Principal |
Christopher Hope | Shrewsbury School | Journalist, Chief Political Correspondent for Telegraph |
Christopher Lee (RIP) | Wellington College | Actor |
Christopher Steele | Wellington College | Former Spy |
Claire Coutinho | James Allen's Girls' School | Secretary of State for Energy Security and Net Zero |
Claire Foy | Oxford School of Drama | Actor |
Clare Balding | Downe House | TV Presenter |
Claudia Winkleman | City of London School for Girls | TV Presenter |
Clemmie Moodie | Guildford High School | Editor - Showbiz (The Sun) |
Cleo Watson | Haberdashers' Monmouth School for Girls | Johnson Advisor, Partygater, Writer of Terrible Erotic Fiction |
Clive Bull | Dulwich | LBC Presenter |
Conor Burns | St Columba's College, St Albans | Tory MP |
Constance Marten | St Mary’s Shaftesbury | Alleged Baby Killer |
Cornelius Lysaght | Eton | TV Presenter |
Cressida Dick | Oxford High | Met Police Commissioner |
Crispin Odey | Harrow | Hedge Fund Manager, Brexit Wanker, Tory Donor, Rumoured Sex Pest |
Daisy Donovan | St Paul's Girls' School | TV Presenter, Actor |
Daisy Edgar-Jones | The Mount School for Girls | Actress |
Daisy Head | Kingswood School | Actor |
Daisy Ridley | Tring Park School for the Performing Arts | Jedi |
Damien Lewis | Eton | Actor |
Dan Mazer | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Screenwriter and Director |
Dan Stevens | Tonbridge | Actor |
Daniel Barnett | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | LBC Presenter |
Daniel Day-Lewis | Sevenoaks School | Actor |
Daniel Finkelstein | University College School | Former executive editor of The Times |
Daniel Hannan | Marlborough College | Brexit Wanker |
Daniel Kawczynski | St George's College | Tory MP, Brexit Wanker |
Daniel Radcliffe | City of London School | Harry Potter |
Daniel Sandford | Magdalen College School | BBC News Home Affairs Correspondent |
Daniel Snow | St Paul's School, London | TV Presenter |
Danny Kruger | Eton | Tory MP |
Darius Guppy | Eton | Lowlife, criminal friend of Boris Johnson |
Darren Henry | Rushmoor School | Tory MP |
David Baddiel | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Comedian, Author |
David Cameron | Eton | Former PM |
David Campbell Bannerman | Bryanston School | Brexit Wanker |
David Dimbleby | Charterhouse | TV Presenter |
David Eades | Kent College | Former BBC News Presenter |
David Frost | Nottingham High School | Unelected Bureaucrat |
David Mitchell | Abingdon | TV Presenter |
David Pannick | Bancroft's School | Barrister |
David Ross | Uppingham School | Entrepreneur, Co-founder of Carphone Warehouse, Johnson Sugardaddy |
David Sainsbury | Eton | Sainsbury's Heir, Former Labour Peer |
David Shukman | Eton | Former Science Editor, BBC News |
David Suchet | Wellington School, Somerset | Actor |
David Walliams | Reigate Grammar School | TV Presenter |
David Willetts | King Edward's School, Birmingham | Former Tory MP |
Deborah Turness | St Francis' College | CEO of BBC News |
Denise van Outen | Sylvia Young Theatre School | Actor, TV Presenter |
Derren Brown | Whitgift School | Illusionist |
Desmond Swayne | Bedford School | Conservative MP |
Dido Harding | Leweston School | Track and Trace Disaster Capitalist |
Digby "Pudding" Jones | Bromsgrove School | Conservative MP |
Dom Joly | Haileybury College | Comedian |
Dominic Cummings | Durham | Former Government Advisor |
Dominic West | Eton | Actor |
Dorothy King | Malvern St James Girls' School | Author, Defender of British Imperial Plunder |
Douglas Adams (RIP) | Brentwood School | Author |
Douglas Carswell | Charterhouse | Brexshitter |
Douglas Murray | Eton | Nat C Conference Speaker, Apologist for The Nazis |
Duncan Baker | Greshams | Tory MP |
Ed Balls | Nottingham High School | Former Labour MP |
Ed China | King Edward's School, Witley | TV Presenter |
Ed Davey | Yarn School | Lib Dem Leader |
Ed Gamble | King's College | Comedian |
Ed Sheeran | Brandeston Hall Preparatory School | Singer Songwriter |
Ed Winfield | Mill Hill School | 55 Tufton Street Scum |
Eddie George | Dulwich | Former Governor of the Bank of England |
Eddie Izzard | Eastbourne College | Comedian and Marathon Runner |
Eddie Redmayne | Eton | Actor |
Elize du Toit | Wellington College | Actor |
Ellie Bamber | Wellington College | Actor |
Ellie Robinson | Northampton High School | Paralympian and Author |
Emerald Fennell | Marlborough College | Actor |
Emilia Clarke | Rye St Antony School | Actor |
Emily Blunt | Ibstock Place School | Actor |
Emma Barnett | Manchester High School for Girls | Journalist |
Emma Corrin | Woldingham School | Actor |
Emma Manners | Ellerslie School, Malvern | Duchess of Rutland |
Esmé Wren | Portsmouth Grammar | Editor (Newsnight) |
Ester McVey | Belvedere School | Tory MP, Former Minister of State for Housing and Planning |
Fabian Hamilton | Brentwood School | Labour MP |
Faisal Islam | Manchester Grammar School | Journalist |
Femi Oluwole | Yarn School | Political Commentator |
Ferdinand Mount | Eton | Journalist |
Finn Harries | Harrodian School | YouTuber |
FKA Twigs | St Edward's, Cheltenham | Singer Songwriter |
Florence Pugh | Oxford High | Actor |
Fran Unsworth | St Dominic's High School | Director of News BBC |
Frank Lampard | Brentwood | Everton Manager |
Frank Turner | Eton | Musician |
Fraser Nelson | Dollar Academy | Tory Presstitute |
Freddie Mercury (RIP) | St. Peter's School, Bombay | Musician |
Frederick Forsyth | Tonbridge School | Author |
Gaby Roslin | King Alfred's | TV Presenter |
Garry Gibbon | The John Lyon School | Journalist |
Geordie Greig | Eton | Editor (Former Mail on Sunday) |
George Alagiah (RIP) | St John's College | BBC News Presenter |
George Eustice | Truro Cathedral School | Tory MP |
George Mackay | The Harrodian School | Actor |
George Monboit | Stowe School | Guardian Environment Correspondent |
George Nash | Winchester College | Olympic Rower |
George Osborne | St Paul's School, London | Former Chancellor of the Exchequer |
George Russell | Wisbech Grammar School | F1 Driver |
Ghislaine Maxwell | Oxford High | Convicted Rape Trafficker |
Gideon Rachman | St Paul's School, London | Journalist |
Giles Coren | Westminster School | TV Presenter |
Giles Dilnot | St. John's School | Think Tank Scum |
Giles Watling | Forest School | Tory MP |
Gillon Aitken (RIP) | Charterhouse | Literary Agent |
Gina Miller | Roedean Moira School | Anti-Brexit Campaigner |
Giovanna Fletcher | Sylvia Young Theatre School | TV Presenter |
Grace Blakeley | Lord Wandsworth College | "Commentator" |
Graham Stuart | Glenalmond College | Tory MP, Minister of State for Energy Security and Net Zero |
Griff Rhys Jones | Brentwood School | Comedian |
Guy Richie | Stanbridge Earls School | Film Director |
Gyles Brandreth | Bedales | TV Presenter |
Harriet Harman | St Paul's Girls' School | Labour MP |
Harry Cole | Tonbridge School | Toxic Slug |
Harry Hadden-Paton | Eton | Actor |
Harry Judd | Uppingham School | Musician |
Harry Lloyd | Eton | Actor |
Heather Stanning | Gordonstoun | Olympian (Rowing) |
Helen Glover | Millfield School | Olympian (Rowing) |
Helena Bonham Carter | South Hampstead High School | Actor |
Henry Blofeld | Eton | Radio Presenter |
Henry Cavill | Stowe School | Actor |
Henry Cole | Eton | TV Presenter |
Henry Dimbleby | Eton | Writer, Non-executive board member of the Department for Environment |
Henry Porter | Wellington College | Journalist, Author |
Holly Willoughby | Burgess Hill Girls | TV Presenter |
Howard Davies | Manchester Grammar School | Chair, NatWest Group |
Hudson Roe | Abbotsholme School | 55 Tufton Street Scum |
Hugh Dancy | Winchester College | Actor |
Hugh Dennis | University College School | Actor |
Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall | Eton | TV Presenter |
Hugh Grant | Wetherby School | Actor |
Hugh Laurie | Eton | Actor |
Hugo Taylor | Harrow | Reality TV Star |
Humphrey Ker | Eton | Actor |
Humza Yousaf | Hutchesons' Grammar School | First Minister of Scotland |
Iain Glen | Edinburgh Academy | Actor |
Iain Morris | Hampton School | Writer, Co-Creator of The Inbetweeners |
Iain Stewart | Hutchesons' Grammar School | Tory MP |
Ian Dunt | Pilgrims Preparatory School for Boys | Anti-Brexit Journalist |
Ian Hislop | Ardingly College | Editor, Private Eye |
Ian McKellen | Bolton School | Actor |
Ian Ogilvy | Eton | Actor |
Ian Payne | Radley College | LBC Presenter |
Imogen Poots | Latymer Upper School | Actor |
Isabel Hardman | St Catherine's School, Bramley | Assistant Editor of The Spectator |
Isabel Oakeshott | Gordonstoun | Tory Presstitute |
Ivo Graham | Eton | Comedian (apparently) |
Jack Dee | Frensham Heights School | Comedian |
Jack Harries | The Harrodian School | Actor |
Jack Whitehall | Marlborough College | "Comedian" |
Jacob Rees-Mogg | Eton | Tory MP, Brexit Wanker, Idiot's Idea of a Clever Person |
Jake Berry | Liverpool College | Tory MP |
James Bethell, 5th Baron Bethell | Harrow | Hereditary Peer, Born Millionaire, Failer of A-Levels But Did Okay |
James Blunt | Harrow | Singer Songwriter |
James Cleverly | Colfe's School | Tory MP, Foreign Secretary |
James Colthurst | Eton | Aristocrat, Radiologist and Friend of Princess Diana |
James Delingpole | Malvern College | Far Right Presstitute, Climate Change Denier |
James Dyson | Gresham's School | Entrepreneur |
James Forsyth | Winchester College | Journalist, Political Editor of Spectator |
James Haskell | Wellington College | Rugby Player |
James Heappey | Queen Elizabeth's Hospital | Tory MP, Minister of State for the Armed Forces |
James Landale | Eton | BBC's Diplomatic Correspondent |
James Max | St Paul's School, London | Talk Radio Presenter |
James Murray | Unknown | Labour MP |
James O'Brien | Ampleforth | LBC Presenter |
James O'Shaughnessy | Wellington College | Tory Peer |
James Schneider | Winchester College | Corbyn Crony, Co-Founder of Momentum |
James Wood | Eton | Literary Critic |
Jamie Campbell Bower | Bedales | Actor |
Jamie Cullen | Grittleton House School | Singer Songwriter |
Jan Morris (RIP) | Lancing College | Historian |
Jay Rayner | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Journalist |
Jemma Forte | Unknown | TV Presenter |
Jenna Coleman | Arnold School | Actor |
Jennie Formby | Bath High School for Girls | Corbyn Crony, Former NEC Leader |
Jenny Agutter | Elmhurst Ballet School | Actor |
Jeremy Clarkson | Repton | TV Presenter |
Jeremy Corbyn | Castle House Prep School | Former Labour Leader |
Jeremy Dyson | Grammar School at Leeds | Comedian, Screenwriter |
Jeremy Heywood (RIP) | Bootham School | Former Head of the Home Civil Service |
Jeremy Hunt | Charterhouse | Chancellor of the Exchequer |
Jeremy Kyle | Reading Blue Coat School | Former Peddler of ITV Poverty Porn |
Jeremy Paxman | Malvern College | TV Presenter |
Jeremy Quin | St Albans School, Hertfordshire | Minister of State in the Home Office |
Jeremy Vine | Epsom College | TV Presenter |
Jesse Norman | Eton | Tory MP, Minister of State for Decarbonisation and Technology |
Jim Broadbent | Leighton Park School | Actor |
Jim Field Smith | Wellington College | Director |
Jo Coburn | North London Collegiate School | TV Presenter of Politics Live |
Jo Johnson | Eton | The Lord Johnson of Marylebone |
Joanna Lumley | St Mary's Convent School on the Ridge | Actor, TV Presenter |
Joe Cornish | Westminster School | Comedian, Screenwriter |
Joe Root | Worksop College | Cricketer |
Joe Strummer (RIP) | City of London Freemen's School | Singer, The Clash |
John Adye | Leighton Park School | Former Director of GCHQ |
John Baron | Queen's College, Taunton | Tory MP |
John Cleese | Clifton College | Comedian |
John Dickie | Loughborough Grammar School | Historian |
John McDonnell | St Joseph's College, Ipswich | Corbyn Crony, Labour MP |
John Peel (RIP) | Shrewsbury School | Radio DJ |
John Penrose | Ipswich School | Tory MP, Former Anti-Corruption Champion, Husband of Dido Harding (qv) |
John Ryley | Eastbourne College | Former Head of Sky News |
John Sergeant | Millfield School | TV Presenter |
John Simpson | St Paul's School | Journalist |
John Standing | Eton | Actor |
John Suchet | Uppingham School | TV Presenter |
John Witherow | Bedford School | Newspaper Editor (Times) |
Johnny Vaughan | Uppingham School | TV Presenter |
Jon Lansman | Highgate | Corbyn Crony, Co-Founder of Momentum |
Jon Moynihan | Ratcliffe College | Liz Truss’s main fundraiser |
Jon Snow | St Edward's School, Oxford | C4 News Host |
Jonathan Bailey | Magdalen College School | Actor |
Jonathan Bartley | Dulwich | Former Green Party Co-Leader |
Jonathan Coe | King Edward's School, Birmingham | Author |
Jonathan Gullis | Princethorpe College | Screaming Monkey Clown Car |
Jonathan Marland | Shrewsbury School | Chairman of the Commonwealth Enterprise and Investment Council |
Jonathan Michie | United World College of the Atlantic | Economist |
Jonathan Whitaker | Blundell's School | Deputy Editor, BBC News |
Joseph Fiennes | Leehurst Swan School | Actor |
Josh O'Connor | St Edward's, Cheltenham | Actor |
Joss Whedon | Winchester College | Screenwriter, film director |
Joy Morrissey | Worthington Christian High School | Tory MP |
Jude Law | Alleyn's School | Actor |
Judi Dench | The Mount School | Actor |
Julia Patterson | Unknown | Author, "Critical" |
Julian Ovenden | Eton | Actor |
Julian Sands | Lord Wandsworth College | Actor |
Julian Smith | Millfield School | Former Chief Whip |
Juno Temple | Bedales | Actor |
Justin Welby | Eton | Archbishop of Canterbury |
Karl McCartney | Birkenhead School | Tory MP |
Kate Andrews | Greens Farms Academy (USA) | Economics Editor, The Spectator |
Kate Beckinsale | Godolphin and Latymer | Actor |
Kate Bingham | St Paul's Girls' School | Chair, UK Government's Vaccine Taskforce |
Kate Humble | Abbey School | TV Presenter |
Kate Winslet | Redroofs Theatre School | Actor |
Katherine Copeland | Yarm School | Olympian (Rowing) |
Katie Hopkins | Stella Maris Convent school | Celebrity Racist |
Katie Razzall | Westminster School | Journalist (Newsnight) |
Katya Adler | South Hampstead High School | BBC News Europe Correspondent |
Kaye Adams | St George's School, Edinburgh | Presenter, Terrible Dancer |
Keir Starmer | Reigate Grammar School (became private while he was there) | Leader of the Opposition |
Kelvin MacKenzie | Alleyn's School | World's Biggest C*nt |
Kemi Badenoch | International School University of Lagos | Tory MP, Secretary of State for Business and Trade |
Ken Bruce | Hutchesons' Grammar School | Radio 2 Presenter |
King Charles III | Gordonstoun | King |
Kirstie Allsopp | Bedales | TV Presenter |
Kirsty Gallacher | St George's School | TV Presenter |
Kirsty Wark | Wellington School, Ayr | Journalist (Newsnight) |
Kit Malthouse | Liverpool College | Tory MP |
Kit Young | Abingdon | Actor |
Krishnan Guru-Murthy | Queen Elizabeth's Grammar School | Lead Presenter, Channel 4 News |
Kwasi Kwarteng | Eton | Former Chancellor of the Exchequer (The Worst Ever) |
Lance Forman | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Brexit Wanker |
Lando Norris | Millfield School | F1 Driver |
Lara Wildenberg | Epsom College | Times journalist |
Larry Elliott | St Albans | Brexit-Loving Economics Editor, Guardian |
Laura Kuenssberg | Laurel Bank | BBC Political Editor |
Laura Lopes | St Mary’s Shaftesbury | Art Curator |
Laura Lopes | St Mary's Shaftesbury | Art Curator |
Laura Tomlinson | St Marys Calne | Olympian (Equestrian) |
Laurence Fox | Harrow | Former Husband of Billie Piper |
Laurie Magnus | Eton | Independent Adviser on Ministers' Interests |
Layla Moran | Roedean | Lib Dem MP |
Lily Allen | Bedales | Singer Songwriter |
Lily James | Tring Park School for the Performing Arts | Actor |
Louis Theroux | Westminster School | TV Presenter |
Louise Mensch | Woldingham School | Former Tory MP |
Louise Minchin | St Mary's School, Ascot | TV Presenter |
Louise Thompson | Downe House | Reality TV Star |
Lucy Punch | Godolphin and Latymer School | Actor |
Lucy Worsley | Abbey School | TV Presenter |
Luke Narraway | King's School, Worcester | Rugby Player |
Marcus Brigstocke | King's School, Bruton | Comedian |
Marcus Fysh | Winchester College | Tory MP, Brexit Wanker |
Marcus Mumford | King's College | Singer, Mumford & Sons |
Marianna Spring | Sutton High School, London | BBC Disinformation Correspondent |
Marina Wheeler | Bedales | Boris Johnson's 2nd Wife |
Mark Dolan | University College School | Presenter |
Mark Featherstone-Witty | Wellington College | Co-founder of LIPA and the BRIT School |
Mark Kermode | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Film Critic |
Mark Rylance | University School of Milwaukee | Actor |
Mark Urban | Rokeby Preparatory School | TV Presenter |
Mark Wallace | Royal Grammar School, Newcastle | Chief Executive of ConservativeHome |
Mark Watson | Bristol Grammar School | Comedian |
Martha Fiennes | St Mary’s Shaftesbury | Director, Writer and Producer |
Martha Kearney | George Watson's Ladies College | Posh BBC4 bee lady |
Martha Lane Fox | Oxford High | Entrepreneur |
Martin Fletcher | Uppingham School | Journalist |
Martin Lewis | King's School, Chester | Journalist, Money Saving Expert |
Martin Reynolds | Magdalen College School | Principal Private Secretary to the Prime Minister |
Martin Tyler | Royal Grammar School, Guildford | Football Commentator |
Maryam Moshiri | Streatham and Clapham High | BBC News Presenter |
Matt Allwright | Reading Blue Coat School | TV Presenter |
Matt Frei | Westminster School | LBC Presenter |
Matt Hancock | King's School, Chester | Tory MP |
Matt Lucas | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Comedian |
Matt Ridley | Eton | Former Northern Rock Chair |
Matt Warman | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Tory MP |
Matthew Amroliwala | King's School, Ely | BBC News Presenter |
Matthew Elliott | Leeds Grammar School | Brexit Wanker |
Matthew Goode | Exeter | Actor |
Matthew Macfadyen | Oakham School | Actor |
Matthew Parris | Waterford Kamhlaba United World College of Southern Africa | Tory Wanker |
Matthew Stadlen | St Paul's School, London | LBC Presenter |
Max Evans | Wellington College | Rugby Player |
Max Hastings | Charterhouse | Journalist |
Mel Giedroyc | Oxford High | TV Presenter |
Melanie Dawes | Malvern Girls' College | Chief Executive of Ofcom |
Melanie Phillips | Putney High School | Journalist |
Michael Ellis | Wellingborough | Attorney General |
Michael Gove | Robert Gordon's College | Former Secretary of State |
Michael Grade | St Dunstan's College | Chairman of Ofcom |
Michael MacIntyre | Arnold House School | "Comedian" |
Michael Palin | Birkdale | Actor, TV Presenter |
Michael Portillo | Harrow County School for Boys | Former Government Minister, Travel Presenter |
Michael Spencer | Worth School | Massive Tory donor, rewarded with peerage |
Michael Tomlinson | Hereford Cathedral School | Solicitor General |
Michael Young (Desc.) | Dartington Hall | Father of Toby Young, Phone Call Maker to Oxford To Get His Idiot Child into Brasenose |
Michaela Strachan | Claremont Fan Court School | TV Presenter |
Mike Parry | The King's School | Professional Gammon |
Miles Jupp | Oakham School | Comedian |
Mimi Webb | Kent College | Singer Songwriter |
Miranda Hart | Downe House | Actor |
Mishal Husain | Cobham Hall | Journalist |
Monty Dom | Malvern College | TV Presenter |
Morgan Lake | Wellington College | Olympic Athlete |
Morgana Robinson | Benenden School | Comedian |
Nadhim Zahawi | King's College | Tory MP, Tax Dodger |
Natalia Tena | Bedales | Actor |
Natalie Bennett | Methodist Ladies' College | Former Green Party Co-Leader |
Natalie Dormer | Reading Blue Coat School | Actor |
Natalie Evans | Rockport | Leader of the House of Lords |
Nathalie Emmanuel | St Hilda's School | Actor |
Navendu Mishra | Clifton College | Labour MP |
Neil Gaiman | Whitgift School | Author |
Niall Ferguson | The Glasgow Academy | Historian |
Nicholas Coleridge | Eton | Managing Director of Conde Nast UK |
Nicholas Soames | Eton | Former Tory MP |
Nicholas True | Nottingham High School | Lord Privy Seal, and Leader of the House of Lords |
Nick Abbot | George Heriot's School | LBC Presenter |
Nick Boles | Winchester College | Former Minister of State for Skills |
Nick Candy | Epsom College | Property Developer, Tory Donor, Tory HQ Lockdown Party Goer |
Nick Carter | Winchester College | Former Chief of the Defence Staff |
Nick Clegg | Westminster School | Former Lib Dem Leader |
Nick Ferrari | Eltham College | LBC Presenter |
Nick Herbert | Haileybury College | Tory MP |
Nick Robinson | Cheadle Hulme | Former BBC Political Editor |
Nick Skelton | Bablake School | Olympian (Equestrian) |
Nicky Campbell | Edinburgh Academy | TV Presenter |
Nigel Biggar | Monkton Combe School | Apologist for Empire, Denier of Genocide |
Nigel Farage | Dulwich | Bollock-Faced Foghorn of Ignorance |
Nigel Planer | Westminster School | Comedian, Actor |
Nigella Lawson | Queen's Gate School | TV Presenter, Chef |
Norman Cook (Fatboy Slim) | Reigate Grammar School | Musician |
Oli Dugmore | Unknown | Presenter, Politics Joe |
Oliver Proudlock | Eton | Reality TV Star |
Olivia Colman | Norwich High School for Girls | Actor |
Olivia Hallinan | St Catherine's School, Twickenham | Actor |
Olly Robbins | Colfe's School | Former Senior Civil Servant (Brexit Negotiator) |
Oona Chaplin | Gordonstoun School | Actor |
Orlando Bloom | St Edmund's School Canterbury | Actor |
Owen Paterson | Radley College | Disgraced Former Tory MP, Brexit Wanker |
Patrick Minford | Winchester College | Brexit "Economist" |
Patsy Kensit | St Catherine's School, Twickenham | Actor |
Paul Dacre | University College School | Former Daily Mail Editor |
Paul Marshall | Merchant Taylors' School, Northwood | Disaster Capitalist |
Paul Scully | Bedford School | Tory MP, Parliamentary Under-Secretary of State for Tech and the Digital Economy |
Paula Vennells | Manchester High School for Girls | Disgraced Former CEO of Post Office |
Peter Bradshaw | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Film Critic |
Peter Frankopan | Eton | Historian |
Peter Hitchens | Leys | Christopher's Annoying Little Brother |
Peter Oborne | Sherborne School | Journalist |
Peter Snow | Wellington College | TV Presenter |
Peter Wilson | Millfield School | Olympian (Shooting) |
Petronella Wyatt | St Paul's Girls' School | Former Johnson "Bit On The Side" |
Phil Spencer | Uppingham School | TV Presenter |
Philip Green | Carmel College | Tax Avoider, Pension Fund Raider |
Philip Pullman | Taverham Hall School | Author |
Phoebe Dynevor | Cheadle Hulme | Actor |
Phoebe Waller-Bridge | St Augustine's Priory, Ealing | Writer, Actor |
Piers Corbyn | Castle House Prep School | Cretin |
Piers Morgan | University College School | TV Presenter, Former Mirror Editor |
Polly Toynbee | Badminton School | Guardian columnist |
Poppy Delevingne | Bedales | Model |
Prince Andrew | Gordonstoun | Sweaty Nonce |
Prince Edward | Gordonstoun | Royal |
Prince George | Lambrook | Heir To The Throne |
Prince Harry | Eton | Royal |
Prince Louis | Lambrook | Royal |
Prince Philip (RIP) | Gordonstoun | Former Prince Consort |
Prince William | Eton | Heir To The Throne |
Princess Anne | Benenden School | Royal |
Princess Charlotte | Lambrook | Royal |
Princess Eugenie | Marlborough College | Royal |
Quentin Letts | The Elms School | Columnist for the Daily Heil |
Rachel Johnson | St Paul's Girls' School | LBC Presenter |
Rachel Riley | Thorpe Hall School | TV Presenter |
Ralph Fiennes | Newtown School | Actor |
Ranulph Fiennes | Eton | Explorer |
Ranvir Singh | Kirkham Grammar School | Presenter, Good Morning Britain |
Ray Mears | Reigate Grammar School | TV Presenter |
Rebecca Hall | Roedean | Actor |
Richard Ayoade | St Joseph's College | Comedian |
Richard Bacon | Worksop College | TV Presenter |
Richard Branson | Stowe School | Entrepreneur |
Richard Curtis | Harrow | Screenwriter |
Richard Dawkins | Oundle School | Evolutionary Biologist |
Richard Drax | Harrow | Tory MP |
Richard Hammond | Solihull School | TV Presenter |
Richard Moore | St George's College | Head of Mi6 |
Richard Sharp | Merchant Taylors' School, Northwood | BBC Chairman |
Richard Spurr | Nottingham High School | LBC Presenter |
Richard Tice | Uppingham School | Brexit Wanker |
Rik Mayall (RIP) | King's School, Worcester | Comedy Legend |
Rishi Sunak | Winchester College | Prime Minister |
Roald Dahl (RIP) | St Peter's, Weston-super-Mare | Author |
Robbie Coltrane (RIP) | Glenalmond College | Actor and Comedian (NB he hated private schools) |
Robert Buckland | St Michael's School, Llanelli | Secretary of State for Wales |
Robert Jenrick | Wolverhampton Grammar School | Tory MP, Minister of State for Immigration |
Robert Laurenson | Sevenoaks School | Co-chair UK JDC at the BMA |
Robert Pattinson | The Harrodian School | Actor |
Robert Swan | Sedbergh School | Explorer |
Robert Winston | St Paul's School, London | Scientist, TV Presenter, Labour Peer |
Robin Walker | St Paul's School, London | Tory MP |
Rocco Forte | Downside School | Hotelier |
Roger Taylor | Truro School | Musician |
Roland Rudd | Millfield School | Saboteur, People's Vote |
Romesh Ranganathan | Reigate Grammar School | TV Presenter |
Rory Bremner | Wellington College | Impressionist |
Rory Cellan-Jones | Dulwich College | News Presenter |
Ros Atkins | Truro School | Journalist |
Rosamund Pike | Badminton School | Actor |
Rose Leslie | Millfield School | Actor |
Rowan Atkinson | Chorister School | Actor, Comedian |
Rupert Soames | Eton | CEO, Serco |
Russell Brand | Italia Conti Academy | Celebrity Sexual Predator (Allegedly) |
Ruth Wilson | Notre Dame School | Actor |
Sacha Baron Cohen | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' | Comedian |
Sally Phillips | Wycombe Abbey School | TV Presenter |
Sam Mendes | Magdalen College School | Film and Stage Director |
Samira Ahmed | Wimbledon High School | Journalist |
Sandi Toksvig | Tormead School | TV Presenter |
Sarah Beany | Luckley House School | TV Presenter |
Sarah Montague | Blanchelande College | Journalist |
Sathnam Sanghera | Wolverhampton Grammar School | Journalist, Author of "Empireland" |
Sean Fletcher | Felsted School | TV Presenter |
Sebastian Faulks | Wellington College | Author |
Sebastian Payne | Dame Allan's School | Right Wing Hack, Think-Tank Numpty |
Seumas Milne | Winchester College | Corbyn Crony |
Sherelle Jacobs | St Paul's Girls' School | Journalist |
Simon Bird | Royal Grammar School, Guildford | Inbetweener |
Simon Case | Bristol Grammar School | Head of the Home Civil Service |
Simon Clarke | Red House School | Tory MP |
Simon Cowell | Dover College | TV Presenter |
Simon Hart | Radley College | Tory MP |
Simon Jack | Merchant Taylors' Boys' School, Crosby | BBC Business Editor |
Simon Mayo | Solihull School | Radio Presenter |
Simon McCoy | Sherborne School | GBeebies Bell-End |
Simon Pegg (yes, really) | The King's School, Gloucester | Comedy Legend |
Simon Schama | Haberdashers' Aske's Boys' School | Historian |
Simon Thompson | Manchester Grammar School | CEO of Royal Mail and misleader of Parliament |
Simon Wolfson | Radley College | Brexit Wanker, Tory Peer, Chief Executive of Next |
Sophie Hosking | Kingston Grammar School | Olympian (Rowing) |
Sophie Hunter | St Paul's Girls' School | Playwright |
Sophie Kinsella | St Mary’s Shaftesbury | Author |
Sophie Raworth | St Paul's Girls' School | Journalist |
Sophie Turner | King's High School for Girls | Actor |
Spencer Matthews | Eton | Reality TV Star |
Stanley Johnson | Sherborne School | Celebrity Wife Beater |
Stella Rimington | Nottingham High School for Girls | Former Head of MI5 |
Stephen Fry | Uppingham School | Actor, TV Presenter |
Stephen Poliakoff | Westminster School | Screenwriter |
Steve Punt | Whitgift School | Comedian |
Steven Barclay | King Edward VII School | Tory MP, Brexit Wanker, Covidiot |
Stig Abell | Loughborough Grammar School | TV Presenter |
Sue Perkins | Croham Hurst School | TV Presenter |
Suella Braverman | Heathfield School | Home Secretary, professional ladder kicker, evil personified |
Susan Williams, Baroness Williams of Trafford | La Sagesse School | Captain of the Honourable Corps of Gentlemen-at-Arms (Lords Chief Whip) |
Susanna Reid | Croydon High School | TV Presenter |
Susie Dent | The Marist School | TV Presenter |
Talulah Riley | Cheltenham Ladies' College | Actor |
Tamara Beckwith | Cheltenham Ladies' College | Socialite |
Tamsin Omond | Westminster School | Green Politician |
Tanya Reynolds | Oxford School of Drama | Actor |
Tara Palmer-Tomkinson (RIP) | Sherborne School for Girls | Socialite |
Teddy Goldsmith (RIP) | Millfield School | Co-Founder of the Green Party |
Thangam Debbonaire | Chetham's School of Music | Shadow Leader of the House of Commons |
Theresa May | St Juliana's | Former PM |
Theresa Villiers | Francis Holland School | Tory MP |
Thérèse Coffey | St Mary's College, Crosby | Secretary of State for Health and Social Care and Deputy Prime Minister |
Thom Evans | Wellington College | Rugby Player |
Thomas Galbraith | Wellington College | Former Leader of the House of Lords |
Tilda Swinton | West Heath Girls' School | Actor |
Tim Davie | Whitgift School | Director General BBC |
Tim Martin | Campbell College | Entrepreneur |
Tim Vine | Epsom College | Comedian |
Tim Westwood | Norwich School | DJ, Alleged Sex Offender |
Tim Willcox | Taunton School | Former BBC News Presenter |
Toby Jones | Abingdon | Actor |
Toby Wallace | Caulfield Grammar School | Actor |
Tom Bradby | Sherborne School | Journalist |
Tom Fletcher | Sylvia Young Theatre School | Singer Songwriter |
Tom Hardy | Reed's School | Actor |
Tom Harwood | The Perse School | Tory Presstitute |
Tom Heap | Oakham School | TV Presenter |
Tom Hiddleston | Eton | Actor |
Tom Hollander | Abingdon | Actor |
Tom Hunt | King's School, Ely | Tory MP, Covidiot |
Tom James | The King's School, Chester | Olympian (Rowing) |
Tom Newton Dunn | Marlborough College | Tory Presstitute |
Tom Parker Bowles | Eton | Food Critic |
Tom Scholar | Dulwich | Former Permanent Secretary to the Treasury |
Tom Sturridge | The Harrodian School | Actor |
Tom Swarbrick | Abingdon | LBC Presenter |
Tom Tugendhat | St Paul's School, London | Tory MP, Minister of State for Security |
Tony Blair | Fettes College | Former Labour PM |
Tracey MacLeod | Ipswitch High School | Journalist |
Trisha Goddard | Sir William Perkins's School | TV Presenter |
Vanessa Feltz | Haberdashers' Aske's School for Girls | TV Presenter |
Vanessa Kirby | Lady Eleanor Holles School | Actor |
Vicky Ford | St Paul's Girls' School | Tory MP |
Victoria Atkins | Arnold School | Financial Secretary to the Treasury |
Victoria Coren | St Paul's Girls' School | BBC Presenter |
Victoria Derbyshire | Bury Grammar School for Girls | TV Presenter |
Victoria Prentis | Malvern St James Girls' School | Tory MP, Attorney General for England and Wales |
Will Poulter | The Harrodian School | Actor |
Will Self | University College School | Novelist |
Will Young | Wellington College | Singer Songwriter |
William Dalrymple | Ampleforth | Author |
William Shawcross | Eton | Commissioner for Public Appointments |
William Sitwell | Eton | Editor |
Winston Marshall | St Paul's School, London | Banjoist, Mumford & Sons |
Yannis Philippakis | Magdalen College School | Singer, Foals |
Yungun | Eton | Hip-hop Artist |
Zac Goldsmith | Eton | Former Tory MP, Disgraced Peer |
Zack Polanski | Stockport Grammar School | Deputy Leader, Green Party |
Zoe Williams | Godolphin and Latymer School | Guardian Columnist |